Skip to main content

He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not

What to do when you're feeling confused.

Photo by Felipe Cespedes

Love is not a decision. Love is a feeling. The feeling is either there, or it isn't. You know from the beginning, because you feel it from the beginning. You also know if the feeling is mutual. However, what we do sometimes, is ignore the signs that tell us that despite how we feel about him, he doesn't feel the same way. We then kind of waste our own time believing that there is something there, that simply isn't. The truth is, if he loved you, you would know. There would be no confusion, and no doubt.

If you find yourself in a situation where you are doubting where it's going and you're not sure if he's feels the same way about you, I recommend asking him directly, "Where is this going? Do you see us working out long term?" If he is unsure, or does not give you a direct answer, then you know what it is. You need to walk away from that situation. Before I get into why, I want to be clear that this post is not about/for married people, and it's not about/for people living together in long-term, committed relationships. I am speaking specifically to those who are still trying to figure it out, people in new relationships, and those who are still looking for a loving, meaningful relationship.

There is a song by Bonnie Raitt called, I Can't Make you Love Me. It was released originally in 1994 and then again in 2011 when it was sung by Adele. In the song she sings, 

"I can't make you love me if you don't. You can't make your heart feel something it won't"

Understand that you cannot make someone feel something that isn't there. No matter how much you want it. No matter how much you love/like him. If you force it, it will not last. Men know from the beginning if they are really into you and if they see a future with you. They know what they want and what they don't want. How many times have you heard of a man saying, "I saw her and I knew she was going to be my wife," or "I loved her since the first day I laid eyes on her." We hear these things from both real life stories and fiction. Men know from the beginning where they place you in their life. If he's not in love with you now, he never will be. That is not going to change. Let's suppose you continue in this relationship anyway. You're together, but you feel unfulfilled. He's probably just sticking it out because he does actually like you as a person, and no one else has come along to turn his head. Eventually though, someone will come along who gives him the real feeling of love. When that time comes, he will either leave you, or cheat. Love is a feeling and he will act on it. It's human nature. This is why we shouldn't force relationships or pressure people to do things they are hesitant about. Because let me tell you, when someone loves you, there will be no hesitation. When someone is in love with you and you're in love with them, it's the best feeling in the world. You can't mistake that for anything and you shouldn't settle for anything less.


Comments

  1. Im a man and I can tell any woman. We are decisive when you are not. We are descision makers by nature. If its real you could never change our mind. Thats why theres alway a "The one that got away". Be cause I was serious and She was not.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

A Blog About Blogging -Someone Please Notice Me!

I've been spending some time joining social networks for Bloggers and checking out other blogs. One thing I've noticed is that a lot of people have a theme for their blog. The other thing that they have, that my blog doesn't have, is a header. I've seen so many pretty header images and catchy Blog titles. I'm wondering, "Is my blog missing something?" I chose not to use a header because I think it will clash with all the colors on my page and make everything look too busy. I chose not to stick to one theme because I have a million things to say and they come in a variety of different topics. I haven't been getting a lot of comments. So, I'm not sure if it has to do with the layout of my blog, or something else like that. I read somewhere online that for every 100 people that view your blog only 10 will comment. I can say that the social networks have paid off. Most of the comments that I received came from people who are members of those networks.

Selecting New Eyeglasses (It's Never a Bad Idea to Consider the Price)

I accidentally threw away my glasses one night, (that's so me, I had put them in a plastic bag with some snacks). That was over a year ago and I just recently took on the challenge of selecting and purchasing new eyeglasses . This is a challenge to me, because I always have a difficult time selecting the best glasses for my face shape and skin tone. Honestly, I hate the way I look in any glasses and if I didn't need prescription glasses in order to operate a vehicle, I would go without them. (I do not recommend that anyone else do that, and I'm sure my optometrist would scold me). In order to prevent myself from getting another ticket, I had to take on the task of finding some glasses that I would feel comfortable and confident in. This time around I did some online research on how to pick out the perfect glasses . I watched some videos, read some articles, figured out my face shape, and then forgot almost everything as soon as I walked into the optical shop and saw

How to Create a Romantic Valentine Room for Your Special Someone

Valentine's Day is just around the corner, and if you're still scrambling for a way to make your significant other feel special this year, why not go the extra mile and create a romantic room for them to come home to? This doesn't have to be an expensive or complicated process, in fact, it can be done on a budget with a little creativity. In this blog post, we'll go over the steps to create a truly special romantic space for your special someone, and show you how easy it is to bring a little extra love to your Valentine's Day this year. Step one: Start by ordering a Valentine Balloon kit from Amazon ahead of time. This will give you a head start on decorating your space with some fun Valentine's Day decor without having to run around town trying to find the perfect decorations. The balloons in these kits usually come in red, pink, and white, and have messages such as "I Love You" and "Be Mine" printed on them. You can choose different sizes,

My First Blog Award!

Winners Grab Your Award Above! I am soooo frickin' happy to have finally received a Blog Award! yay! Thank you to Momma Michie who awarded it to me and 14 other well deserving bloggers! Momma Michie's blog is informative and upbeat, but it's also heartwarming and consists of many great topics us moms like to read about. So be sure to check her out! The rules to receiving the "One Lovely Blog Award" are the following: 1. Post the award on your blog along with recognition to the person who gave it to you with a link to their blog. 2. Award 15 other well deserving blogs that you have discovered. 3. Don't forget to contact the winners you chose for the award!Here are my 15 "One Lovely Blog Award" winners! 1. My Personal Cafe 2. Momhood Moments 3. Yes, Divas CAN Cook 4. New England Nanny 5. Three B's and Me 6. Cappuccino Confessions 7. A Nut in a Nutshell 8. A Place of Comfort 9. Momma D & Da Boyz 10. Mreow! 11. Mom Talk with 3 Kids and Us 12. B

Thursday Thoughts

I guess there comes a time when every mother has to come face to face with their teenager and let them know who's boss. Mother/daughter relationships can be difficult during these years. This Thursday's Thought: "Mother Nature is providential. She gives us twelve years to develop a love for our children before turning them into teenagers." ~William Galvin The reason behind the thought: My daughter crossed a line last night. This line crossing showed blatant disrespect and has changed our relationship forever. My daughter turned 13 in March. It's only been a few months and one of my worst fears has already come true. The fear that she would one day forget how much I love her and how much I've been here for her through the years. I've never had a teenager before and this is all new to me, but one thing I am not going to do is play friends with her and allow her to disrespect me.

...and they had the nerve to complain about a shirt that said cunt

I'm giving this guy a thumbs down for being a jerk and wearing the N-word on his shirt.

Bratz Big Kidz Music Stars

I tried my hardest to catch these dollies on sale this year. I planned to buy four. One for each of the girls. But they were selling out like crazy. My daughters just love Brat dolls. I don't know why. They have big heads, they break much easier than Barbie and they seriously overdue it on make-up. I was happy when MGA came up with the Bratz Kidz Dolls. These dolls don't where as much make-up. What I liked most about these Big Kidz, is that they are NOT dressed in slutty clothes. Although Yasmin's outfit still shows a little tummy, it is much more appropriate than others I have seen on this brand of doll. So anyway, as I searched the net for the new Bratz Big Kidz Music Stars, I could not find Sasha anywhere. I found the Bratz Big Kidz Snap-On Doll Sasha (who's skirt is way too short), but I could not find the Music Stars doll. I checked everywhere I could think of, (in the US) and found nothing. However, while searching the net I found that many stores in the UK ha

I Heart Faces Week 16 (April 19th) "Collages"

Please click on the image to view full size.